Women with cerebral palsy often complain that intercourse is impossible, difficult or painful because of spasms and/or legs not parting. Here are some ideas put forward by a collection of such women. We hope to be running a forum on this subject in our Members Area.
Have an orgasm prior to penetration (using a vibrator or whatever) — this will relax your genitals so that the spasms subside and hips relax.
Botox might help but it would need someone specially trained to administer it.
If the muscle spasm is triggered by vaginismus, then training will deal with it. The problem with some CP women is that they may not be able use the most effective method of desensitizing the vagina — self exploration. A GP will advise.
Calming the mind can help with spasms, such as imagining someone stroking your hair.
Instead of telling yourself to relax, aim to reduce movement to zero: a conscious effort is often required to inhibit involuntary muscle activity.
Biofeedback — Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy (HBOT) / learning breathing skills might both have a beneficial effect as they increase the amount of air inhaled, and reduce spasms.
Some people can also learn to ‘store up’ spasms and let them out at a more convenient time
Positions — most women prefer it from behind, but one woman says” I find that woman on top is best, at least in my case, it seems to reduce tension somehow. Another position is making your partner kneel in between your legs and lean forward a little then you can wrap your legs round his waist and lift them a little. It is a little uncomfortable but it works. The “missionary position” is the most difficult.”
If you have difficulty parting your legs, ask your partner to be gentle and take time, discussing what is best for you, so together you find a way to enjoy intercourse.